It’s been a long, long time since I’ve played any real arcade-style games. Last time I picked up a controller to play any sort of side-scrolling, button-bashing, streets-of-fury style game I was a much younger person. With SNES controller in hand, my friend and I playing the likes of TNMT: Turtles in Time, Contra III or Battletoads & Double Dragon.
See the problems with my playing these sorts of games are:
- I’m no good at them.
- I lack the toned fore-arm muscle of the veteran gamer.
- I lacked a console.
Well I now have a console, so I have no excuse as to whether I could try to play them or not. Turns out I still suck at them, but that doesn’t stop me from trying. The forearm muscle is a slow process, and I’ve already given myself muscle strain resulting in a fantastic carpel tunnel attack. You just don’t feel like a man until you’ve got to ice your forearm because of extreme button mashing.
Or is it “You just can’t feel like a man when you have to ice your forearm because of extreme button mashing”?
Either way, it hasn’t stopped me from playing Castle Crashers with extreme vigor.
I am currently very in love with The Behemoth‘s Castle Crashers. It’s a game that I can pick up and put down for an hour or so at any given time. It’s got this quality about it that lets me enjoy it (whether it’s frustrating the crap out of me or not) every time I sit down to play. Maybe it’s the solidity of the game mechanics; maybe it’s the well-placed fake-outs and humor; maybe it’s the constant challenge it provides. It’s very probably because of the joy one gets from beating the hell out of various enemies with reckless abandon.
Probably all of the above.
Mechanics
So as I said, the game mechanics are pretty solid. I’ve only ever run into one issue with the game crapping out, and that was at my friends house where a cut scene didn’t activate. We have no idea how we did it, nor do we know how to recreate it. We weren’t too pleased with that fact, as we had to do the whole damned level over again.
The enemy A.I. is only so complex, and yet it still manages to take full advantage of when you’re down. It thrives on kicking you in the kidneys while you’re on the ground. Revels, one might even say. They see, to have a set pattern of having equal numbers of guys attacking you head on and magicing/arrowing your unfortunate self. It does get aggravating after a while.
Castle Crashers has a bit of an RPG element to it by including an experience bar, four stats you can add points to (Attack, Magic, Defense, Agility), and even has hidden items, weapons, and pets. A neat twist with it all is that you gain experience by landing blows on enemies, and not by killing them. It took my friend and I a while to figure out why he was exceeding me in experience despite my doubling (sometimes tripling) him in kills. This introduces an interesting quandary: Get a weapon that adds to your Physical or Magical attack, or sacrifice those stats for increased Defense (allowing more hits on bad guys).
The sweetest part about the game is that after you’ve beaten it in normal mode, you can switch to “insane” mode and play through it all again. Now I used to wonder why they dubbed it “insane,” until I started playing through it. Hard mode, as it turns out, is for sissies. Insane mode basically triples or quadruples every enemies defense, health, and damage. Believe me that we are actually stuck fighting through a certain area because my friends magic user is useless in it. We honestly can’t do enough damage fast enough to the murder-machines.
Castle Crashers also does a fine job of introducing a variety of game modes. You have your standard side-scrolling bashery, your auto-scroll dodging level, your random swimming level, and even a flying portion. They really manage to mix things up as well as making everything feel fresh. It actually tooke me a moment to realize that there are a bunch of auto-scrolling levels, because they don’t really feel like them. That’s impressive
Humour
I cannot talk too much about the humour of the game without giving away most of the gags therein. Suffice it to say that there are many times when my friend were caught laughing for far too long at a well delivered joke. The active humour aside, many of the animations within the game allow for a solid chuckle. Watching the King bounce around on his Pony while being attacked by thuggish bees is just so absurd that you can’t help but laugh.
Did I mention that you play a game of volleyball as a “boss fight?” No? Well there you are then.
Visual/Audio Appeal
Castle Crashers is, quite simply, nice to look at. Sure, it’s not some insane 3d rendered planetscape where everything looks photo-realistic. In fact it’s almost simple in its cartoony goodness. Having said that, there is obvious polish that has been added to everything. Subtly added things that just help make the presentation of the game that much better. Maybe it’s the fact that you can see a bad guys skeleton when he gets electrified, or how enemies smolder after they’ve been hit with fire. How about an enemy that throws up the horns before you fight?
I have to mention quickly that when you’re not fighting for your life, make sure you give the backgrounds a gander. They aren’t amazing in and of themselves, but they do usually contain within them more humour and added style that makes everything just that much better.
It’s the little things that really bring about a great visual experience, and this game does it in spades. Oh, and the game is HD ready. That’s an added bonus.
Now the audio in this game is something that just cannot not… not not be enjoyed. The boys over at Newgrounds (where some of The Beheamoths crew came from) have released much of the music in their Castle Crashers section if you’re interested. Much of the music loops flawlessly (there are some exceptions, sadly) and I can guarantee that at least one of the songs will get stuck in your head. The common one for me is the song that plays within the Ark.
Throw in some solid action sounds (raising undead baddies never sounded so good!), and you’ve got yourself some really solid audio to enjoy.
Replay Value
This game comes with so much potential replay value that I am tempted to use the term “oodles.” I won’t but it’s right there, in the shadows, waiting patiently. First off, You have all of the Achievements, which are standard 360 fare. Then you’ve got all of the pets to collect, All of the weapons to get (some of which require you to trade with other players online), and 20 unlockable characters. If that wasn’t enough, there are even two mini games added on:
- All you can Quaff: this game is basically an exercise in pain. You mash the X and Y buttons repeatedly trying to eat your food faster than anyone else. First to finish five plates wins!
- Arena: It seems to play the first arena in offline mode, and I can only assume that online mode yields a “to the death” mode with the players.
On top of all that is the fact that you can play Castle Crashers with up to three other people online making it all that much more fun. Many of the Achievements actually require you to play in online mode, which is both a good and bad thing.
Cost
Dirt cheap. I can’t recall the exact price (somewhere around 800 Microsoft Points rings a bell) but it’s utterly worth it. This game pays for itself in play time as well as over all enjoyment. Added to that are DLCs (Downloadable Content Packs) which give you access to new playable characters, weapons, and even a new pet. They currently only have one DLC out (costing 160 Points), though there are many hints as to more.
Overall
Totally and completely worth it. If you have an XBox 360 and you don’t have this game, you are basically shaming yourself. It’s cheap, it plays well, it’s funny, it’s enjoyable, and it’s got oodles of replay value. I can’t think of a reason you wouldn’t want to get it.
9/10
God damn it all to the Abyss I said “oodles.”
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